I Did Not Approve This

Poor, sad, cut-down tree.

That? Right there? Was the view from my bedroom window this morning. I went upstairs to take a shower, and just as I was stripping down to my unmentionables, I heard it.

Chainsaws.

My first thought was, "Huh. Randall has finally gone off the deep end and has gone all Georgia Chainsaw Massacre on the neighborhood."

Then, my second thought was, "I'd like to see that."

So, I peeped ever-so-carefully out of my blinds.*

And what did I see? The death of your majestic, sod-killing tree. Now, all I want to know is... WHERE IS MY DAMNED HOA MODIFICATION REQUEST/NOTIFICATION THINGAMAJIG?!? I didn't sign off on bupkis and when you get home, Missy, there had better be one in my mailbox. Pronto. Or there's going to be Hell to pay.

Either that or you just get me drunk on Moscato, as usual, and we'll call it Even-Steven.

Later on, whilst enjoying a mug of coffee with Bailey's cherry cordial (the afternoon drink I've decided to call #winningatmotherhood) Jarrod asked me to help him organize his Pokémon cards. During the entire procedure, this was me:

I heard through the Rachel grapevine that you're coming home on Saturday. After this, there will be one, COUNT 'EM!, ONE more blog post. SQUEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Slán, ya'll!

*Even though I only popped up one blind, at eye level, just enough to peek out of, I was paranoid that the entire neighborhood could see my secrets from Victoria.